Low self-esteem and career indecision

When you struggle with low self-esteem, making career decisions can feel completely overwhelming. It’s not just a question of ‘what do I want to do?’, it becomes a question of ‘what if I make the wrong choice and prove I’m not good enough after all?’.

Low self-esteem often shows up as second-guessing, overthinking or deferring to what seems “safe” or “realistic,” even if it doesn’t feel right. You might downplay your strengths, assume you’re underqualified or convince yourself that the things you’re passionate about are out of reach. The idea of taking a risk — applying for that job, switching paths, starting something new — feels paralysing, not because you’re not capable, but because you’re so used to doubting yourself.

The more you avoid making a decision, the more stuck you feel. The inner critic gets louder. The self-trust gets quieter. You might find yourself drifting into roles that feel convenient but not aligned, saying yes to things you don’t want or staying in environments that shrink you — not because you lack ambition, but because you’re afraid you don’t have what it takes to go after more.

But building self-esteem means learning to trust your voice. It means allowing your desires and goals to matter even when they scare you. It means recognising that you don’t have to be perfect or 100% confident to take the next step. Indecision often lessens when you stop trying to find the “perfect” path and start giving yourself permission to explore, change your mind and grow.

 

Signs to look out for:

  • Constantly comparing yourself to others in their careers

  • Feeling underqualified even when you’re experienced

  • Avoiding big decisions out of fear of failure or judgement

  • Staying in jobs that feel “safe” but unfulfilling

  • Difficulty identifying your strengths or passions

  • Feeling like you have to “prove yourself” before making a move

  • Ruminating over “what ifs”

  • Believing your dream job is for “other people,” not you

 

Let’s re-frame:

 

I have no idea what I want to do

→ Maybe I’ve just never been encouraged to ask what I want.

 

I need to be sure before I make a move

→ Clarity often comes from action, not just thinking.

 

I’m not good enough for that role

→ I don’t have to be perfect to be capable.

 

What if I fail and everyone sees?

→ Trying and learning is more valuable than staying stuck.

 

Other people are doing so much better than me

→ Comparison steals focus from my own path. I can define success for myself.

 

I should just be grateful I have a job

→ Gratitude and ambition can coexist. Wanting more doesn’t make me ungrateful.

 

If I choose the wrong path, I’ll regret it forever

→ Few decisions are final. I can change direction as I grow.